Like if Portishead had somehow ended up being called Beth Poole…
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[5.29]
Micha Cavaseno: The result of how Chuck Klosterman was always so gleeful to inform us that Kelly Clarkson’s “Since You Been Gone” was “totally a FREAKIN’ Crue song, maaan!” I’m using “metal rules” for this so let’s see: Solo’s trash, no riffs, drums is wild basic, keyboards attempting subs instead of just power metal “LEMME PLAY THE CLASSICAL BITS TO SOUND EPIC” thing, guest vocalist is trash and Jennifer is a perfect pop singer using metal as a vehicle. Nothing wrong with that, Freddie Mercury made fake metal too; so did the aforementioned Crue and many others. But it doesn’t have to be meh just because its fake.
[4]
Megan Harrington: As a critic, I suppose I would say this is competent pop-metal. As a listener, I begged my critic self to let me turn “Kaleidoskop” off before the halfway point because it’s so boring and too loud.
[5]
Anthony Easton: This was less metal and less grindy in subsequent listens, and defintely has some Eurobosh somewhere in its DNA — sort of like what happened if an Evanescence clone was raised in Germany instead of the United States.
[6]
Brad Shoup: Punk rawk clang leavened with a healthy helping of Euro fantasy existentialism on the refrain. Jennifer Weist ravages the text, and she bops right along with the guitars, and I guess that’s something.
[5]
Hazel Robinson: I didn’t realise there was a vein of stuff to tap between rockabilly-revival and nu-metal and I kind of really want to applaud Jennifer for finding it but also this is unfortunately not very exciting, no matter how amazing her shoulder pads are.
[6]
Alfred Soto: The hair trigger intensity of Bricks are Dead-era L7, with the sludge sludgier and the bludgeon harder.
[7]
Patrick St. Michel: You build a simple but catchy song, but then invite some dude to growl over it and turn it silly.
[4]