Maybe the radio edit can be “Pork U Better.”
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[3.56]
Jonathan Bogart: What if Ke$ha had no wit, no unexpected savagery, none of the reflexive insistence on the supremacy self that people call star quality? And participated in shitty duets with Travie McCoy?
[4]
Katherine St Asaph: Judging by Neon Hitch’s former single, bestiality anthem “Bad Dog,” I can only imagine that this is about getting revenge on an ex by fucking his betta fish. While ripping off “Umbrella.”
[1]
Iain Mew: A truly impressive exhibition of Britney bleating, this. She manages to make “hey”, “say”, “dignity” and “me” all rhyme and it’s not even noticeably weird unless you’re really listening to the lyrics! Which I don’t recommend doing. They’re a total void, as is the whole song apart from the chorus and its crassness in sentiment and execution. That’s a fairly potent cheap thrill in itself.
[5]
Brad Shoup: It’s times like this when I’m thankful for Stooshe’s guidance.
[1]
John Seroff: Neon Hitch’s (no relation, presumably) meritocratic approach to relationships is masculine, joyous and surprisingly offbeat for a want-you-back track; the autoburbled subtext is “if not, your loss”. NH’s voice is thick with accent and bite and quite possibly phlegm; every word is punctuated by a thickly strangled, weirdly pleasurable yowp. “Fuck U” is raunchy, dumb fun; the sort of thing Robyn would aspire to but overthink in the making. A radio-edited version without the hissing Fs and popping Ks should yet retain enough of the essential tang to satisfy, but PLEASE: anything but “Love You Better,” okay? Nobody needs another neutered fucking song.
[8]
Alex Ostroff: “I can sex your brain”? Is that like giving birth in reverse? Further points deducted for apparently sullying the “Woo! Yeah!” sample, by (a) using it at all, and (b) burying it so deep in the mix in the chorus that I can’t tell if it’s actually being used or not.
[2]
Rebecca Toennessen: Sassy and confident ladies win with me every time. Especially if they’re sexy. And super especially if they’re foul-mouthed. That generic backgroundy Ibizia-y bip-bip doesn’t overpower the delicious, nasty funk.
[7]
Jer Fairall: Autotuned fembots have feelings too.
[3]
Alfred Soto: I doubt it.
[1]