All proceeds from the sale of this single go to the Buy Wale A New Bed With Non-Fucked Bedsprings Fund.
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[3.40]
Anthony Easton: I looked at how long was left on this track after I thought it had lasted seven minutes or so; it had lasted two. It did not become more interesting in the remaining time, but dragged on in a similar fashion.
[3]
Jonathan Bradley: Tiara Thomas approaches lines like “I never made love … but I sure know how to fuck” with enough reserve to hint at sensuality and sorrow without succumbing to either. With Spanish guitar and a languid hip-hop beat, “Bad” has the makings of the kind of thug love duet that’s been in too short supply this decade. (The bedspring rhythm would be novel if Trillville hadn’t got there first on the raunchier — and superior — “Some Cut.”) But Wale blusters too much in his role; he sounds more interested in rapping than seduction, a lack of focus liable to turn off both lady and listener. When he slows his delivery to clumsy monosyllables, he sounds like he’s turned off his brain rather than switched up his flow.
[4]
Rebecca A. Gowns: There’s a sample of what sounds like a squeaking bed, persisting all the while underneath the spare beat. It’s a simple little trick, and it separates it from your average R&B track: a peek into a couple’s internal monologues while they’re having make-up sex for the 50th time. Wale, as the old dude who used to be fresh, and Tiara Thomas, the newcomer, could have easily fumbled it, but the overall effect is gentle, introspective, and pretty pleasant to listen to.
[8]
Crystal Leww: Wow, the only original thing about this track is that creaky swing noise, and it is really annoying.
[2]
Alfred Soto: The perennial up-and-comer doesn’t come for almost five minutes, too busy being an equal opportunity shit talker about good and bad girls. Present company excepted? He best beg Thomas to pluck her acoustic licks in the future.
[3]
Josh Langhoff: This the fucking anthem. Get it? The fucking anthem. Get it? The fucking anthem. Get it? But wait, there’s more! Order now and you’ll also get Sex Is Bad, Woman’s Issues Exist To Make Her Sexy, Wetness Between Legs, oh my word squeaking is going to be a thing isn’t it like in ‘04-’05 when all the radio played was DRIPPING, sometimes i still hear the dripping mffffffrgghhhh sawblade slicing through bed destroy
[1]
Brad Shoup: Digging into unchanging hookup dynamics, Wale does fine. But Thomas wins with pinched vowels and a refrain that closes like a coerced confession. Late-night R&B stretched on an acoustic canvas hits me better than it used to, but jeez: change your fucking mattress.
[6]
Daniel Montesinos-Donaghy: Wale is at his most fascinating when he writes about his attempts at understanding how women work. The most interesting moments of (pre-MMG retconning) album Attention: Deficit showcased a roving eye, an interest in fleshing out the characters of songs like “90210” and “Diary” that were at least admirable in their writerly ambitions. What he hasn’t yet mastered is understanding how to write songs about seducing women, his pre-meditated knottiness having brought us lines like “horny and white, that’s Anglo-Sax” and the deathless head-slapper “took her forever to get dressed/I acknowledge your effort.” “Bad” almost finds a way around cringiness with its wink-wink joke of having squeaky bedspring fx act as distracting percussion, a musical choice that grows more ridiculous every time the frowny Tiara Thomas chorus resurfaces. The headliner’s having none of it, bypassing an attempt to play fast and loose so he can get caught up in exhibiting his technical prowess. The “beg/nope/bed /floor” run is a fun diversion (reminders of Lil Wayne’s immortal “chest/feet/tag/bag” splutter from “We Takin’ Over Remix” abound) but there’s far too many instances of him trying to get away with stuff like “I can see the ocean by going between legs.” You’d think a Larry David stan would just run with the bedspring joke to fist-biting comic extremes – Jerry can’t come in to pass notes soon enough.
[5]
Jer Fairall: “I ain’t up here to judge,” Wale claims in his upfront dismissal of monogamy, but sticking his female duet partner with all of the lines about guilt and commitment issues and an inability to make love reveals him as a moralist of the most hypocritical sort. But had this contained even a hint of self-awareness, it still wouldn’t excuse what has to be the most comatose slow jam in history.
[2]
Iain Mew: This track has broken me. I regret every time I have ever suggested before that something was difficult to listen to, because whatever issues I had with those shrink into insignificance next to the physical repulsion caused by “Bad”. Or to be exact, by its squeaking springs, with gaps timed just right so that I can never even get used to them and their nerve-shredding effect for long and spend much of the long, long experience bracing in terror. I can’t even tell you about the song, how am I meant to pay any attention to that?
[0]