Is it too late to start calling him Master Pea?
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[2.71]
Brad Shoup: Oh good, will.i.am’s reggae song. Or whatever it is. It may be his contribution to an upcoming Zelda title. Or maybe he’s partnering with a manufacturer of top-shelf lighters. Fergie, be afraid: he entrusted Eva with the light lifting.
[3]
Katherine St Asaph: This is vulgar. No, not in that sense — though it’s that too — but in the sense of being ruthless, unsubtle. Needing a hit, but lacking Peas, will.i.am finds stand-ins. He tosses Eva Simons’ fake-Fergie over an old piano bed being repurposed as a chorus, pastes in C:/Users/William/My Documents/bosh/raveup4.wav, answers “Where is the Love?” with “It was in your iTunes store all along!” then hires some ringers to concur, with the following crowd participation: HELL, YEAH! The radio edit will undoubtedly be INTEL, YEAH.
[2]
Jonathan Bradley: will.i.am whips up an unappetizing stew in which the worst features of every ingredient come to the fore. Mindless hedonism? Can be fun. Here it’s soul-deadening. Auto-Tuned exuberance? It’s never sounded more past its use-by date than when dripped over this Black Eyed Pea’s tones. Shouting crowds delivered freeze-dried with the tune? It worked for “OMG,” but “This is Love” induces instant agoraphobia.
[2]
Edward Okulicz: Makes a meal out of some of my least favourite musical ingredients, and these ingredients aren’t exactly fresh. This has the sound of something that’s going to sell a lot of copies and make people with discernment very very miserable and battered around the ears.
[3]
Iain Mew: There’s not really a song here at all, just a series of big paper-covered doorways for the various elements to punch their way through and shout “SURPRISE!” – the compressed crowd noise; the piercing electronic breakdowns; Eva’s gurning, overcooked interventions. It’s so wearying that Will’s rap bits come as a relief for at least being a known quantity. A very known quantity when he starts going on about hardness again.
[1]
Alfred Soto: Although the beats are tired and Simons blasts away like she wandered into the studio from American Idol, will.i.am does have a knack for rudimentary piano melodies. He should really narrow his ambitions so that writing sonic updates of “Celebration” doesn’t become his metier.
[4]
Jonathan Bogart: I really want to be someone who goes against conventional wisdom to declare will.i.am one of the great pop auteurs of our age. And insofar as you can immediately identify a will.i.am production — big electro beats, not much else — he is an auteur. Of course, so is Michael Bay.
[4]