Sorry for not doing anything off your second album and not liking this more. Love, TSJ.
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[5.86]
Katherine St Asaph: You can tell nothing from Fight Like Apes’ lead singles. The Body of Christ and the Legs of Tina Turner had “Hoo Ha Henry,” a perfectly adequate FLApes thrash with blokes thrust up goats from line one; but the album isn’t just adequate, it’s a panoply: the loud single that doubles as fandom friend-crush weepie, the perfect breakup song, the all-purpose buzz band diss, the song about literally mutilating that dude your age who prefers 18-year-olds to women — OK, to you — and no one finding that remotely wrong. (Fight Like Apes’ songs are best when they’re hyperspecific.) “Crouching Bees” is now the second time I’ve been fooled by a FLApes lead single. I should know by now; even a Naked and Famous sync-synth riff shouldn’t be enough to fool me. Sellout this is not; deceptive unrequited-love song, though? Like “Tie Me Up With Jackets,” it’s about outre love-lust — the perfect lyric here is “I want you stuck to every corner of my face” — and, like Cher Lloyd, about wishing that you inspired those lyrics in others, that The Womanly Arts weren’t so damn difficult. (This is the second track I’ve mentally slotted in with a Wendelin Van Draanen book, but c’mon: “Why in the world would Charlie want to go steady with Helen? … It suddenly hit me that Helen probably had perfect little knees with no scars or scabs anywhere. Helen probably didn’t even own a pair of shorts she could wear under a dress, and Helen probably had a room full of dolls and curtains of lace.”) In a different world, “why don’t you look at me that way,” in this cadence, would be in a girl-group song — one of the really good ones.
[7]
Brad Shoup: Possibly the greatest bike-related cry for help since Fifteen’s “Helter Smelter,” “Crouching Bees” has the mandated synth-haze and lope. Luckily, the latter gives it the propulsion to match the theme, and MayKay has the outraged devotion to break up the easy groove.
[7]
Edward Okulicz: A pretty-good The Naked and Famous song, but only a sort-of-okayish Fight Like Apes one. Even if it sounds more like the ravings of a madwoman than a soft drink commercial, you can’t help but long for the sort of abrasive sugar rush that would have accompanied this prime MayKay rant on one of the first two albums, to say nothing of their former sense of concision. No, wait, something does need to be said about that — this is twice as long as “Lend Me Your Face” and it does not have to be.
[6]
Anthony Easton: I love her voice, and how it makes this track so much more jangly. In fact this might be the jangliest of the jangly pleasures. The little interruption near the last verse doesn’t really need to be there, and you could cut a couple of choruses. This at 90 seconds would be ideal. At twice that length it is merely good.
[6]
Megan Harrington: As a title, “Crouching Bees” establishes expectations that most bands couldn’t meet and Fight Like Apes are among the most. There are worse ways to spend four minutes, but secretly the best time for this song is when you can’t think of anything you want to play. By its end you’ll have something else you’d rather listen to in mind.
[4]
Alfred Soto: The you’re-soaking-in-it synthesizer line and darting vocal delineate the charms and limits of the post-Goth sound; I’m fond of the way MayKay Geraghty’s voice cracks singing the excellent “I’d pop a wheelie for you, hey!” But it doesn’t signify beyond its proficiency.
[5]
Cédric Le Merrer: Really really loved their previous album. Really really don’t know what to make of this. Sounds like a fine bitter ditty to close an overstuffed album, or to be slotted between a couple of more energetic tracks. I can see myself getting to really like it there, but as a lead single it has lovely moments but it’s kind of aimless.
[6]