Move over Isabella of Castile and Elizabeth of York: here’s the definitive 1501 queen…
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[6.29]
Ashley Bardhan: The loop is pretty simple, the flow isn’t super exciting, and the lyrics are pretty standard rapper braggadocio (but the line “I’ll knock the shit out that bitch like a enema” is special). And yet, I don’t care, because I would still drink alcohol to this song and also I love when women say bad words. “It is what it is.”
[6]
Ryo Miyauchi: “Realer” depends a lot on the larger context of Megan as an up-and-coming rapper with the biggest buzz right now. A stray boast about big budgets appears, yet the claims of why exactly she’s envied remain mostly generic, with haters and critics existing merely as boogiemen. With a calculated aye flow that crawls as slowly as its anonymous beat, this song could come from countless other rappers trying to boost their reputation.
[5]
Tim de Reuse: Some of the most unique delivery I’ve heard in recent memory; there’s a punch on almost every syllable, lending it a strangely addictive stop-start quality. The tune as a whole feels like more of an introduction to her work than any kind of magnum opus, though, because there isn’t anything in the lyrics original enough to really stick in the head.
[7]
Jacob Sujin Kuppermann: This reads mostly as a “Big Ole Freak” retread, with Meg reprising the producer and her flow to mostly diminishing returns. She’s on point as usual, never wavering from her chosen poses, but the beat is threadbare and doesn’t do her justice. For now, it’s good enough, but an artist with her talent and charisma deserves to be making more interesting stuff than this.
[6]
Will Adams: My qualms with the song’s short runtime are probably just growing pains of this new, sub-3:00 era we’re still entering, but nonetheless Megan Thee Stallion packs a punch into the time she’s given, delivering both a rousing hook and gusto everywhere else.
[7]
Nortey Dowuona: Sharp, staccato strings walk in over a fog of synths, then heavy, warm bass drums bounce up as Megan snatches them and uses the beat as a belt, chilling in her jean shorts.
[7]
Taylor Alatorre: The level of focus here is admirable and could be taught to politicians as a lesson in message discipline. There are no digressions, no deviations from Megan’s core argument that she does, in fact, keep it realer than real. Her delivery has enough bite and the production has enough H-Town to keep it from feeling one-note, but overall this feels more like an effort to find a steady footing in a post-“Bodak Yellow” world than a stab at anything groundbreaking. “I’m a real rap bitch, this ain’t no pop shit” — if that distinction still exists, it isn’t evident here.
[6]